LOST (Rolls Royce incident #2)

Greetings true believers! So as those of you who have been reading the blog for a while may know, the first time the W.A.S. hit Miami, there was the infamous “Rolls Royce incident” (See Arithmetic For Playas pt. II: June 18th) Unfortunately I wasn’t in Miami with the team at the time, but I heard plenty about it.

Well, JM had another show in Miami this weekend…

And well gang, there was another incident with the same Rolls Royce. Now I will say, everything that the guys told me about people’s reaction when you’re riding in a car like this is 100% true. In a city filled with brand new Lambos, Ferraris, Bentleys, Maybachs, and even Phantoms (new RR’s), there’s a totally different respect people show for a vintage Rolls Royce. It’s like “old money,” it gives off an air of being established and not trying to “keep up.”

Anyway, Wolfmaster Z, Janelle Monáe, and I were cruising South Beach in the Corniche feeling real Vip-ish. We stopped to eat at David’s Cafe. We had a great meal. Then the incident…

We get back to the car after dinner and it wouldn’t start. No honking horns this time, just a car that won’t crank. After deducing that our problem was gas (yes I know, ironic, we were flossing in a Rolls Royce, but we were riding on empty,) we set off on what seemed like a mile-plus trek to the only gas station in the area (Google maps on the iPhone is the $#!+.) JM was not too happy about this at all. She had a performance in a couple of hours and the last thing she was trying to do was go on a long-@$$ walk to get some gas.

We got to the BP station, bought some gas containers, filled up, and after a failed attempt by me to flirt our way into a ride with some girls at the gas station, we hopped in a cab on our way back to the Rolls.

We got back, put 3 gallons of premium unleaded in, and… Vroom. Thank God. Disaster averted.

So, I’ve just finished watching season 3 of “LOST” this afternoon on iTunes. So right now my mind is in a bit of mystical, deeper meaning kinda place (more than usual.) Here’s a LOST-like theory on the Rolls Royce and why it acts the way it does towards the W.A.S.:

Maybe the car is telling us “you’re not ready for me yet, maybe you should’ve driven the Volvo, or rented a Corolla or something.” Maybe the Rolls doesn’t want us to get spoiled, or feel like we’ve made it, or feel that we’ve accomplished what we set out to do yet, or feel that we deserve to ride it. Maybe that’s why every time we drive it/ride in it, there’s an un-jiggy, humbling experience that goes along with it. So, we get to enjoy the attention and V.I.P. treatment that comes with riding in a vintage Rolls, (in Miami everyone like to have nice cars parked in front of their establishments) but it’s always tempered with a “bring yo @$$ back down to earth” experience. We’re two-for-two. Maybe there’s something to this…

Now this is simply a fun/interesting theory. I don’t necessarily believe it, but I do like to look for meaning in things. Sometimes there really is a lesson to be learned. It’s just something to think about. I’m just using the Rolls like “LOST” uses the Island: as a representation of the higher power.

…One more thing. While typing this blog I realized something very silly (stupid) that we did: We freakin’ walked to the gas station (15-20 min) and rode a cab back to the car (not even 5 min)… Ha!, and I thought we were supposed to be a pretty bright bunch… (jl)Maaann!(/jl)

M. A. Martian,
The Wondaland Arts Society


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